Age Miracle Cream Did Not Work

I AM a Desperate Wife

I am sure you have seen the ad. A wrinkled, spotty and dull skinned woman is turned into a beauty with a flawless complexion within 7 days by a miracle cream. The husband notices the change and his attitude towards the wife changes. He serves her a romantic candlelit dinner. A romantic and risque conversation ensues. Remember all this happens after after the wife uses the cream for 7 days." Who believes all this crap?" you ask yourselves. Well th answer is women like me. Middle aged women desperate for the attention of their busy husbands.

So I Bought the Miracle Cream

I am a sceptic and a pessimist but I could not resist the ad. Also my friend Sammy said the cream worked for her I believed her because she is smart and sensible. This cream is not cheap. My husband called me" high maintenance "when I bought it. I am OK with the way I look but I wanted my husband's attitude towards me to change.

I Noticed the Change

I noticed a change in my face within 7 days. The skin was dry and felt taut. I am yet to see a change in my husband even after using the cream for 7 weeks. He still comes home, in time for dinner, tired after work. He eats whatever I cook without complaining, for which I am grateful. Then I get to listen to the sweet music of his snoring.

The advertisers Know Us Too Well

My husband is a typical lankan husband from what my friends tell me. Most middle aged men are busy with work. They are at the prime of their careers. The middle aged woman can see the signs of aging on her face which makes her insecure. If the woman has two lovely teen-aged daughters, like I do, who remind her frequently that she is old it makes matters worse.

The advertisers are smart to use these facts. We desperate women suspend our disbelief to buy the cream. A miracle cream can't teach a husband to cook and serve a fancy meal. I was stupid to think that it would. I am sure the man in the ad is a gigolo. Thats what I tell myself to console myself. A husband who doesn't notice a new hairstyle is not going notice the effects of a cream, however miraculous.

Actually I am reassured because my husband did not noticed my (hopefully) younger looking skin. If he had I would have started worrying that he would leave me for a younger woman.

Is Tuition Essential ?

Good Teachers Small Classes

My daughter wants to be an engineer to save lives. We have put her into a school which has good teachers and where the classroom sizes are small. I decided to send my daughter to this particular school because I do not want to send her for Tuition. The students can ask the teachers for extra help. Also my husband claims to be an engineer (even though I am not aware of him doing any engineering, ever) and can help our daughter with maths.

I'm no Super Mum

From what I hear the hours of the tuition classes are long and inconvenient. How do the children find the time or the energy to study and to do homework after they finish with school and classes? Also I do not fancy Driving around Colombo and it's suburbs in the middle of the night. I am not a self sacrificing martyr of a super mum.

The Enablers

I am getting worried about my decision. All my aunts, cousins and friends, whose children are doing ALs or have finished recently, tell me that it is not possible to get good results without good tuition teachers. They are being helpful. They want to give me the numbers and addresses of the best teachers. They offer to organise the classes and even guarantee As.

Are we Addicted to tuition?

I have a niece who is the same age as my daughter. She manages wonderfully without tuition and is planning to go to medical school next year. She even has a social life. She does not live in Sri Lanka.

Why are we addicted to tuition? Is it the herd mentality or are we insecure?

Tell me if you think I am making a mistake

Have you or anyone you know passed the ALs well without tuition, in Sri Lanka? What's your opinion on tuition?

The Dreams of Jeevs - Oh to be Singapore

Jeevs To The Rescue.

Since I have been feeling angry and anxious these past few days I called my cousin Jeevs. Jeevs has the wonderful and unique talent of being able to cheer me up. Now let me tell you something about Jeevs first. He is the golden boy of our family. He was held up as an example, to all us lesser cousins, by our grand mother. He is very smart and now a very successful man but a supporter of the Sihala Urumaya. Though he is a lovely person Jeevs is a Sinhala chauvinist. I blame our grandmother for this.

Sri Lanka Is Like Singapore

So yesterday Jeevs worked his magic on me and cheered me up. He told me that everything was going to be ok. He believes that Sri Lanka is going to develop under MR and be like Singapore in the near future. His reasoning is that Singapore too does not have a proper democracy. The opposition is virtually non existent. It is ruled by a family dynasty too - the Lee dynasty.

Choosing Candidates in Singapore

Since our political parties are in the process of choosing candidates I thought I'd check how it's done by the PAP, the ruling party in Singapore. I found the descriptions of the new candidates. They are mostly from the business world - CEOs, GMs and Directors but also an Eye Surgeon, a Professor and some lawyers. These men and women seem so great..... it brought tears to my eyes. I got the impression that suitable people are invited to contest.( Please let me know if you know how the candidates are selected in Singapore). You should check them out.

( The link is HTTP://www.pap.org.sg) . Following is an extract.

14 MANIFESTO

We believe that the quality

of the candidates is critical.

We want men and women

of substance, with ideas and

commitment.

– Mr Lim Boon Heng, PAP Chairman,Introduction of PAP New Candidates Session 4,s

3 April 2006.

In choosing candidates to become Members

of Parliament, the PAP Leadership looks for

the 4Cs – Capability, Character, Commitment

and Compassion. Candidates must also have

strong convictions on issues so that they can

add to the robust debate within the PAP, leading

to the formulation of sound policies for the

good of Singapore. They must also care for other

Singaporeans. Some candidates carry with them

a wealth of experience in grassroots work; others

do not. But they will develop the political touch

after they become MPs, as they will learn to move

people in the right direction. Because “Action” is

the Party’s middle name, the PAP looks for people

who can get things done.

Unlike in Sri Lanka there are no Actors, Singers or Talk show hosts. They chose people who can manage and develop the country. We chose entertainers because one of the main tasks of our politicians is to entertain.

How it's Done in Sri Lanka

I heard a rumour that prospective candidates here are asked

1. How much money they can spend for campaigning

2. How many thugs they control

3. How many vehicles they have at their disposal

Please feel free to correct me, but politely.

I really do want to believe Jeevs (hope he has not got the computer animations of the election propaganda confused with reality). So I hope our political parties will choose candidates similar to those of the PAP. We have to have peopole capable of develpoing this country. Some of our present MPs are criminals, clowns and incompetents. These guys would never be in the Singaporean parliament, they would be in the Singaporean prison - now you know why the crime rate in Singapore is low.

Please not Duminda Silva

Rapist and Abuser

Duminda Silva was imprisoned for raping a 13 year old girl. Pedophiles are people with serious psychological problems. This man also kept Anarkali a virtual prisoner and abused her. When she escaped she was kidnapped. Well that's what Anarkali said. The only reason any party would nominate Duminda is because he has money and thugs.

UPFA does not need Duminda

The ruling party, the UPFA, is sure to win the upcoming general elections. They have enough resources to fight the elections (legitimate or otherwise). So they do not need Dumimda Silva. If MR is serious about the Mahinda Chinthana he has to get capable people elected to parliament. I mean with the knowhow, skills and ability to spearhead the development program not people capable of criminal activities. Maybe the MR has no choice but to nominate Duminda as no decent person is willing to come forward.

I am specially sickened by Duminda because I am the the mother of two girls who are teenagers. They are so innocent and vulnerable. If a teenager is raped her whole life is ruined and it will affect even her future children. The effects of this wile deed will be felt for generations. Originally I wanted to write this as a plea to the President but then decided that it is pointless.

Things look good for Duminda

According to the word on the street Duminda will be nominated and he will elected to parliament because he has money to throw around (so probably it's ill gotten) . So we will have to see the larger than life images of this aberration of human nature for a while.

It's not all Bad

Last weekend I was driving to Odel to satisfy my craving for a Burger from the Sandwich Factory. I lost my appetite completely when I saw the big billboard of Duminda calling himself the " Pride of Colombo". Thy say every cloud has a silver lining so I am hoping I'd be able to shed my extra kilos thanks to Duminda.

GL was Disgusting

GL was on Rupavahini last night.

He said that in his opinion, as a citizen of this country, the worst effects of SF's statements is the loss of trade and aid. He said the result of SF talking about abuse by the army will slowdown the economic growth.

Is he telling us to hide human rights abuses for economic reasons? He is a former academic. What lesson is he teaching us?

There are mothers who ignore it when their husbands abuse their own daughters. It's to protect their reputations and to have economic security. They find fault with the daughter if she reveals the truth. What GL wants us to do is something like that.

People usually respect academics. GL gives academics a bad name along with the VCs who went on TV to support MR. University administrators getting involved in politics is against regulations but as they supported the president it's ok.

MR is Not Entitled to Abuse

A Parent Has no Right to Abuse His Own Child

A mother gives birth to a child but that that does not give her a right to abuse the child. What is expected of the mother is for her to take care of the child to the the best of her ability. Everybody agrees that a parents who abuse their children are the worst criminals and should be punished. Right?

A Man Does Not Have a Right to Abuse an Animal

A man who takes in an injured animal, takes care of it and cures it does not then get the right to starve it, torture it and keep it locked up. All of you agree with me. Right?

Why do You Think MR has the Right to Abuse?

Then why do the supporters of MR think that MR can abuse his powers because we won the war against the Tigers? Why do the supporters of MR think MR and clan have the right to plunder this country and distort the law to destroy opposition?

I am very grateful to MR for ending the war but I don't think that it gives him the right to be corrupt, above the law and not have common decency. He should be a caring parent to the people of this country and take care of us to the best of his ability. He should not be a bully that all of have to live in fear of.

Why Didn't the Liberated Tamils vote for MR?

The Tamils of the north and east suffered the most because of the Tigers. MR liberated them. How come these Tamils did not vote for MR? If any of you know the reason or have any theories please let me know. I am genuinely puzzled. This is not a rhetorical question.

I am Scared

A very bad start

If this is the start of the second presidential term I truly dread the rest.

I am the mother of two young daughters. The next few years are vital for them. The time futures will be decided.

I am scared

Our leader is ruthless. Does not care about the opinion of others. His buddies are the leaders of Libya, Burma, Iran, China and Russia. I don't think MR sees anything wrong in what he does. A sociopath like his best buddies. I lived through the Premadasa era. This could be worse.

I am a pessimist so usually things turn out better than I expected.

Today I am in shock.

I don't know what to expect.

So I am scared.

Politicians NEED the Masses Ignorant

MR Supporters do not Gloat

Abdul Halik, it is true that the ignorant masses elect our leaders. So MR supporters, you should not gloat. The politicians like the people ignorant. There is a high rate of literacy in this country so the people are not ignorant in the conventional sense.

If only the Masses Knew

An average Lankan is clueless about economic policies and monetary policies of the governement. They have no idea of how the governement gets money for it's expenditure. They do not know that a substantial propotion of the money they spend on purchases go to the governement. They do not know how inflation happens.

Would the masses have voted for MR if they knew that their money was funding the lavish lifestyle of MR, other politcians and their clans, the election campaign and the governement wastage? The masses can't afford the basic foodstuff and health care is in a mess. They fund fleets of vehicles and foreign travel for the politicians while the public transport is a mess and some can't even afford bus fare.

Free Education - Opportunity Wasted

It is easy to educate the public because we have a free education system. My 14 year old daughter studies Business Studies in school. She understood, within half an hour, the use of fiscal and monetory policies by the governement to manage the economy, economic growth,recession ect.

Making it compulsory for students to learn the basics of economics and money management would be no problem. As it is students are forced to memorise ancient litterature and history- not essential life skills. Whoever decides on the syllubuses and exams either does not know that there are books available or want to numb the brains of students so that they can be controlled and manipulated.

Politicians Need the Masses Ignorant

Ignorant people can be manipulated easily and if they are poor it's easy to buy their votes. Masses do not realise that an increase in wages will result in inflation so of no benefit. They do not know that the Central Bank figures are fake. How can the the GDP be growing if architects are out of work?

So the politicians will keep the masses ignorant.

Death at Engineering College

Suicide Due to Stress

It's the no.1 college for engineering. Highly competitive entrance exam. Students are offered jobs before they graduate. This college seems a lot like the University of Moratuwa, the best university of our country.

Students commit suicide due to stress. The director justifies it saying the students need to learn how to handle stress. The students study engineering not because they love engineering or are interested in it but to get a good job and to please their parents. The grades are based purely on book learning.

Parents' Expectations

The parents expect the children to earn good money and solve the family's problems. A son who is an engineer is for status and image. Nobody cares about the happiness or well being of the child. The interests or aptitudes of the child do not matter. It's just cramming. The parents think they are martyrs for sacrificing everything for their kids and the kids are under obligation to please their parents.

Three Idiots

This is the story of the movie 3 Idiots now showing at the Majestic Cinema. It's a must watch for parents, teachers and university staff.

It Changed My Views

I thought strict discipline with suspension and expelling was good. Not anymore. It's a disaster for the students and their families which are often poor. The lives of these people should not be destroyed. University administrators should show some compassion. These students have been under so much stress from a very young age. Irrational and bad behavior is to be expected.

I thought that my children should get a good degree i.e. a degree in demand in the job market. Sri Lanka is a poor country. Do we have the luxury of choosing a career that we love? After watching the movie I am afraid to let my girls go anywhere near an Engineering college. So I am confused now. I don't know what is best for my girls.

Parents are selfish. They have no right to decide on a child's career and to expect them to solve the family's problems.

The Movie : Highly Recommended

The movie made me question my believes. So it's a good movie. I sobbed watching it. My young friend said she did not cry that it's a comedy. I suppose mothers react differently.

My Problem : How do I get my daughter to give up maths and study English Lit to become a writer? Writers are so glamorous. She will be able go to cocktail parties in lovely sarees and big necklaces. I'd love to have a famous daughter... Engineers are dull and boring. I just could not get why the parents in the movie wanted the sons to become engineers.

Colours of Happiness @ Barefoot

Colour Therapy

On Monday, when I was feeling anxious about my daughter going to a new school so I went to Barefoot for a session of colour therapy. It's fast, it's free, no stigma attached to it and works every time.

When I feel sad or down or anxious I go for therapy to Barefoot. The beautiful colours there cheer me up. Every colour there is unique, beautiful and can not be copied. They the colours of gems and give me such sensual pleasure. Like going into Ali Baba's cave sans the danger.

The staff look happy to see me, I feel welcome.

Counselling for Free

As I walked in I saw my favourite aunt, Anu. So I got myself free counselling as well.

MM: I put Tish into a new school. I am soooo worried.

Anu: Why?

MM: There are boys.

Anu: So what? High time she had a boyfriend.

MM: She has to study.

Anu: You studied, what good was that? Studies do not matter. It's living that's important.

Well aunt Anu knows what she is talking about. She is the mother of three perfect sons. An Engineer, a Doctor and an Accountant. I felt much better after our little chat.

Unfortunately I could not get a top that was the right colour, size, style and fit.

Happiness

It's good to take a little bit of happiness home. A cushion or a table mat or a coaster to keep my morning cup of coffee makes me happy. A barefoot bag is my happiness on the go. We have to make ourselves happy and little things make me happy.